In regards to politics, can you write an amusing paragraph or 2 or 3 that includes these phrases?

The students walked into the cafeteria just after noon, but someone had already gotten there. On one wall it appeared someone had tried to paint a mural using food as their medium! "Good grief!" Jimmy gasped. "Looks like the work of a deranged Liberal!" "Look!" Susie pointed. A lone boy emerged from the kitchens, bottles of ketchup in his hands. He began to splatter ketchup randomly on the food on the wall. "What are you doing?!" Susie asked. The boy continued, muttering, "If only life imitated my dreams..." Jimmy yelled, "Hey, kid! What are you DOING?!" That time, it reached the boy. Calmly he looked back at the two. "I read an article in the Washington Post which inspired me." Jimmy shook his head."When did the Washington Post suddenly get the monopoly on wisdom?" "It isn't wisdom of which I'm speaking.Two men painted with toothpaste on a city street. But the truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand. So, I'm showing them that it can be done on a simpler, and smaller scale." The teachers arrived, gasped, and quickly grabbed the would-be artist. "The principal will deal with you!" the math teacher, Mr. Wilkinson said. The kid merely smiled. "History will remember me with fondness." As he was dragged away, inspiration struck him. "Hey, you! You kids! I'm going to make a lifesize diorama of the Civil War with Dixie cups! Save your Dixie cups... The South shall RISE again!" The students laughed, cheered, and clapped.